Hello. I’m sitting here, the rest of the family is asleep. I’m watching old reruns of Murder She Wrote and thinking about you. I miss you. Recently I’ve found myself wishing I could ask you questions about pizza dough and day-planners. I wish I could hear about all the happenings with your Sunday School class, the Beth Moore study you’re doing and what social event you’re helping plan at the Village Retirement apts. I wish I was helping you make fried chicken and 7-grain rolls on a Friday night before we all play skip-bo and eat pecan pie. I would enjoy drinking coffee with you now days. You always waited to eat dessert until an hour or so after dinner. You always went to bed with a clean kitchen. You had a post-it note in your day-planner to remind you to water the plants. You were frugal. You made homemade bread. You washed and cut up your produce as soon as you got home from the grocery store. You ate slowly. You enjoyed travel. You loved your friends. You savored moments. You loved to read, teach, mentor. You were concerned with health/wellness. You exercised. You loved hymns. You loved the Lord. You were organized. You had a place for everything. You saved tin foil and you washed ziploc bags to reuse. You knew a lot of things. You did not graduate from college, but you found yourself retiring from a Vice President position in the local bank. You were on committees and Chamber of Commerce boards. You were community minded and proud of your little town. You loved your husband well. You loved your girls and their husbands. You loved your grandchildren. You loved your church. You loved Jesus.
Mother’s Day comes soon and instead of struggling as much with missing Noah, I am finding myself wishing I had you here. I just miss you. I know we all do. I think of the ways you would do things and I smile.
The other day I was making pizza dough for the girls and I to make pizza. I still have your old pizza oven and we get it out here and there to make your pizza. The yeast I had on hand had “expired”, but I used it anyway. I wanted to ask you if you thought it would work. I realized after I thought about it, that you would have probably just told me to try it and see. So I did and it rose. It was great! 🙂
You worked diligently and the way you treated people was one of the main reasons you excelled at your work. You were career minded, but your heart was still in the home. Somehow you did it all and made it look easy.
I think about the last time we got to visit. You told me that “it will be ok”. And it is. It really is. All is ok. I suppose you know that better than I do.
I remember all the details of Christmas, Thanksgiving, even just regular ol Friday night dinners. You poured your heart into it all. You were patient with me and even though you didn’t show a lot of emotion, you were honest. You prayed for me, I know you did. You supported me. You loved me. You are why my girls’ Mimi is so good at being a Mimi.
You are missed. But, I know you would not want me to mope. I guarantee you would want me to pay it forward, be involved, do my best, serve, cook a home cooked meal and enjoy the bread. But, make sure there are leafy greens on the plate too. You would want me to savor, slow down and read a good book. You would remind me it will be ok. But, only because God makes it so. You were sharing the gospel with anyone who had ears. 🙂
This Mother’s Day I want to find ways to celebrate you. So, I will be the committed friend, I will pay attention to details, I will water my plants (one of which is yours and I’ve kept it alive, miraculously), I might even make 7 grain rolls and pecan pie. Whatever I find to do, I will savor it. I will appreciate it. I will share. I will make the places I find myself, better. I will be sure those around me know that life is worth living all because He lives.
I truly believe you were finding the heart long before hashtags and silly blogs. You were finding the heart of it all and living it right before my eyes. Thanks for loving us so well, Mimi. Thanks for living life and enjoying it so fully. Thanks for noticing. Thanks for savoring.
Thank you for #findingtheheart
Hug my boy for me. Tell him all about me please. Give PawPaw my love and thanks. Give Travis a hard time for me. I love you!